Jeff M writes an open letter to the Dangerous Flower, Hana Kimura as we approach the one year anniversary of her tragic passing.
To The Beautiful Flower, Hana Kimura
Hana, I watched as much of your career as I possibly could. It started during your first match against your mother, and I was instantly a fan. You had the it factor, even as a fresh-faced performer, and I was hooked from bell to bell. I was amazed at how good you looked in the ring. Even as a rookie, you clearly had the tools needed to become a major player for years to come. Over the next few years, I watched you rise up and put on so many great matches. You made me love wrestling again.
When I heard the news about your tragic death, I broke down and I cried for the first time in ages. I felt, and still feel like, you deserved so much better than what you were given. You didn’t deserve the hate and negativity that you got. Everything I’ve ever read and seen about you, I know you were a kind and sincere person who just wanted to do what you loved.
Hana, even now when I think of you, tears come to my eyes.
I wanted to say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you didn’t have anyone you felt you could turn to. I’m sorry that people suck and they pushed you to take your own life. The world took a moment of anger you showed and turned it into hate that you never once deserved. I wish that I had had the chance to meet you, even once. I would have told you just how amazing I thought you were. How you made me love wrestling again after I had grown tired of the sport. How you were never alone and that you could have reached out to me at any time. I would have looked you in the eye and told you that I loved you. Of course, I would mean that as a performer, but I know that you were someone who deserved to be loved for who you were.
I’ve watched your matches over and over again for the last year. I’ve rewatched your tribute shows countless times. Every music video tribute as well. Every time I watch you in the ring, I’m reminded of just how special you were. How talented you were. Even though you’re gone, I want your memory to live on. I want the world to know just how amazing you actually were. I want the world to love you as much as I do.
The motto of the TCS stuck with me, as much as your matches did. Everyone is Different. Everyone is Special. Those words were true then, they are true now, and I feel that you were the embodiment of those words. You were different than any other performer I had the privilege of watching in the ring. I’ve said it so many times, but you were special. You really were.
Hana, you deserved the world, and now that you’re gone it is up to the world to remember you. I will do my part and I will absolutely never forget you. Until the day I take my last breath, you will forever own a place in my mind and in my heart. May 23rd will forever be a day of remembrance for me. I hope that wherever you are, that you are smiling down at me and your legion of fans who still remember and love you. I hope that your tributes make you happy. I pray that you are in a better place where you are loved for who you are. I’ll do my best to live a life that honors you and I will try like hell to make sure that everyone remembers you forever.
I love you, Hana Kimura. I will never forget you.